Expectations ruin everything... or most things. Let's be real, we all have expectations when we go into different situations.
But do these expectations really help us, or hurt us?
What happens when you have certain expectations (not knowing if they are going to be met) and then they are not met?
uh huh... frustrating, right?
And when we have an open mind and go into situations without expectations? Are we then pleased with what we get?
More times yes than no.
See, what we then start thinking in these situations is, "Oh life isn't happening how I think it should happen."
This is the main source of misery in our lives. There are two ways to fix this.
- Change the world to make it what you think it should be.
- Change your thinking.
Which one of these do you think is easier? Yea, that's what I thought. Putting those side by side, changing your thinking is much easier. Your thoughts become things. Yes I'll say it again.
THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS.
So if you want your dreams to come true, you must still think about your dreams often, and change your expectations. There are a few ways to do this:
- Have no expectations. That doesn't mean you don't have goals or have visions. This just means you don't calculate every single detail.
- Fill up your gas tank (metaphorically). Every time you spend time worrying, or thinking too much, or building expectations, you are using your fuel only revving up your engine and not going anywhere. That fuel is better used on thinking that will project yourself forward. Spend less time thinking, more time doing.
- Figure out who in your life is wasting your fuel, being that annoying "backseat driver". Who are the people in your life treating you like you are 3 years old, and putting expectations on you to become something (a doctor, a lawyer, or follow the family ways/career), when you haven't even begun to think for yourself. Block out those outer forces, and starting thinking for yourself.
- Remember what happens within your heart and mind is controlled by you. No one else.
Sadhguru (an infinitely wise man) mentioned in one of his videos I watched recently, "happiness is a tomorrow thing." He further explains our thinking of that if thing 1, thing 2, and thing 3 happen, I will be happy. We expect that we are not happy until these things happen, then we forget about today. And as those things we so desire seem to get further away, or slowly closer, we keep chasing and chasing, and that creates suffering because we think that these things are what are going to make us happy. Without them, we are miserable.
Translation: we must first establish ourselves and be happy and joyful today. You cannot act then try to establish yourself. It is much more difficult that way.
In closing here is something Sadhguru said that hit at home run and wraps up all of this:
"Just do this one thing. Naturally you will become pleasant. When you're already pleasant, still 10,000 things still haven't happened in my life. So what? With a joyful zest I will go after it. And the chances of fulfilling those expectations are far better. If they don't happen, who the hell cares anyway? Because my experience of being here is wonderful whichever way."
Mind blown. Be you, because no one else can.
Success & Lifestyle Coach
P.S. Let go of expectations and be more pleasant. If your'e ready to dive deeper into how to release expectations, send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org and setup a free 30-minute clarity call. It's free! You know what? I like you, so it'll be a free 60-minute clarity call if you book in October. You can start seeing results right away even in one call. I'll be waiting for you!